voxen

Chapter 1

Brendan stopped in Chloe’s doorway as if he had walked into the wrong room. His eyes went first to me, then to the white urn in the crib, and finally to the pale blanket I’d folded beneath it.

“What is that?”

I kept one hand inside my pocket, closed around my father’s phone. “Your daughter.”

For a moment, he didn’t move. The house hummed around us—the air vent, the grandfather clock downstairs, Claire’s voice fading in the hall. Brendan looked from the urn to me again, his expression trying on different answers.

“What are you talking about?”

“Chloe died.”

His mouth opened, then shut. He glanced toward the crib, as if the urn might explain what I had said. “No. When?”

“Three days ago.”

The silence after that was so complete I heard the small click of the clock changing minutes downstairs. Brendan had been home less than a minute, and already he looked past me toward the door, toward the hall, toward whatever explanation he could control.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

I felt the hard edge of the phone press into my palm through my pocket. “I tried.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“It’s the only one I have.”

He came a step into the room. His coat was still on, his tie loosened, the scent of cold air and expensive cologne following him. When he looked at the urn again, his face tightened—but grief didn’t come. Not yet. Maybe it couldn’t. Maybe the news hadn’t reached him. Maybe he was already calculating who else had heard it.

“You called me about a bill,” he said.

“I called seventeen times during her crisis. You answered once, three days after she died.”

His jaw flexed. “Nora.”

“Don’t say my name like it’s the problem.”

He looked at the crib, then at the folded blanket. A tiny yellow sock lay near the headboard. I’d found it beneath a stack of hospital clothes and put it there without thinking, the way I used to set out things for the morning.

Brendan reached toward the urn.

“Don’t.”

His hand stopped in midair. For an instant, surprise cut through his anger. Then his fingers curled and fell to his side.

“You brought her home like this?”

“I brought her home.”

He looked at me sharply. “Where is the certificate? The hospital paperwork? What did they tell you?”

“I don’t want to talk about paperwork.”

“Someone has to handle it.”

“I handled it.”

The word landed between us. His gaze shifted to the crib again, and the room seemed to shrink around all the things that no longer had a purpose: the night-light shaped like a moon, the stuffed rabbit with one bent ear, the little paper stars I’d taped over the bed. Brendan had never asked me to take them down. He had never asked me to put them up.

He drew a breath through his nose. “How much did this cost?”

I stared at him.

“That isn’t what I meant.”

“Then say what you meant.”

He pressed two fingers against the bridge of his nose. The gesture might once have looked tired. Now it looked like a man trying to keep a situation from getting away from him.

“I’m trying to understand what happened.”

“Then look at her.”

His eyes met mine. For the first time, something in his composure faltered—not tenderness, not quite, but the knowledge that he had missed something he could not make smaller by naming it differently.

He looked at the urn.

I waited for him to say her name. He didn’t.

“Who knows?” he asked.

The question turned the air cold.

“Claire.”

“Who else?”

“Why?”

“Because this is a family matter.”

“She was your child.”

“And she was yours,” he snapped. Then, after a beat, he softened his voice. “Nora, I’m not trying to fight with you. I need to know who you’ve spoken to.”

I pulled my hand from my pocket but kept the old phone tucked against my palm. “You need to know whether I’ve spoken to someone who can help me.”

His attention flicked to my hand. “What is that?”

“Nothing you need to manage.”

“Don’t do this.”

“I’m not doing anything to you.”

He exhaled, sharp and impatient. “You’re upset. You’ve been through a terrible few days. Let me take care of what needs to be taken care of.”

The words found the place they were meant to find. For years, they had sounded like shelter. Tonight they sounded like a door closing.

“No.”

Brendan blinked. “No?”

“No, you don’t get to take charge of this room. You don’t get to move her. And I’m not calling Ximena.”

His expression changed at the name. “I didn’t say anything about Ximena.”

“You were about to.”

“I was going to ask whether she’d handled the account.”

“Chloe is not an account.”

“I know that.”

“Do you?”

He looked away first. It was brief, but I saw it. Something like anger moved under his skin, working to cover the blankness his absence had left behind.

“Where’s your phone?” he asked.

“Why?”

“Because you’ve been making calls.”

“People have been calling me.”

“Who?”

I didn’t answer.

He took another step. “Nora, give it to me.”

The old phone was warm now from my hand. I pictured my father’s careful handwriting on the paper tucked inside its case, the only number written there. I pictured the quiet pause after Raymond answered, his voice recognizing me before I’d explained why I was calling.

I pictured the wedding day, too—my father holding that phone out to me as guests waited beyond the open doors.

If you ever realize you can’t leave freely, call the number inside.

Brendan watched my face as if he could read the words there.

“What did you do?”

“Something for myself.”

He gave a short, humorless laugh. “You don’t even know what you’ve set in motion.”

“Maybe not.”

That answer seemed to unsettle him more than a threat would have. His eyes narrowed, and his attention fixed on the hand I had half closed around the phone.

Then its screen lit.

A name appeared above the missed-call notification.

RAYMOND.

Brendan went still.

I had expected anger. I had expected him to ask who Raymond was, to demand an explanation. Instead, his face drained of color so quickly I wondered whether I’d imagined it.

“Where did you get that number?”

“It’s my phone.”

“Your father’s phone.”

I tightened my fingers around it. “You remember him.”

“I remember Raymond.”

The clock downstairs chimed once. Brendan glanced at the screen again, and the fear in his face hardened into something more useful to him.

“You called him?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because my father told me to.”

His mouth pressed into a thin line. He looked toward the hallway, then back at the phone. “Raymond has no business getting involved.”

“I didn’t ask your permission.”

“You don’t understand who you’re inviting into this.”

“Then explain it.”

He didn’t.

The phone buzzed in my hand. Raymond’s name remained bright between us.

Brendan stepped into the doorway. “Give me the phone.”

I moved toward the hall, but he shifted with me, filling the opening with his shoulders. Behind him, the house stretched away in warm lamplight, every polished surface reflecting a life that had been arranged around his approval.

“Nora,” he said, his voice low now. “Give me the phone.”

I looked past him, toward the stairs.

May you like

He didn’t move.

And the old phone buzzed again in my palm.

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