Chapter 3: What She Told Me To Say
The door clicked shut and the ballroom went away.
It was quieter in the dressing suite than I expected. The walls were pale and soft and there was a big mirror with lights all around it and a couch that smelled like perfume. My ears were still ringing from all those people looking at me. Vivian stood by the door with her hands still clasped. Richard knelt down again so his eyes were even with mine. I could hear him breathing.
He didn't say anything at first. He just looked at the cloth in my hands.
My fingers felt sweaty. The cloth was still crumpled the way Mom had folded it. I had been holding it so tight my knuckles hurt. I loosened my thumb and then my fingers and I unfolded it one corner at a time.
The ring was in the middle. It was small and silver with a little stone that caught the light from the mirror. It wasn't shiny like Vivian's necklace. It was worn down on the edges.
Richard made a sound when he saw it. It wasn't a word. His chest rose fast and then stopped. I saw his hands start to shake before he reached out. He didn't touch it right away. He held his hand just above my palm, like he was afraid it would disappear.
"Mom gave it to me," I said. My voice was small in that room. "Before she passed away."
That was what she told me to say. She made me practice it at our apartment on the nights she couldn't get up anymore. She said if I ever found the man in the navy suit at the gala, I had to show him the cloth and tell him her name. She said he was supposed to know the truth. She made me say it over and over until I didn't cry saying it.
Richard's breathing changed. He breathed in through his nose and it caught. He finally picked up the ring between his thumb and finger and turned it over. I saw his eyes get wet. His mouth opened a little but nothing came out.
Vivian moved from the door. Her heels clicked once on the floor.
"Richard," she said. Her voice was very calm and very clear. "That is Caroline's ring. The Caroline who worked for the foundation. Remember? She was an assistant for one season and then she left."
She said it like she was helping him remember. Like she was fixing a mistake. She smiled at me but her eyes didn't smile.
"She left on her own," she said. "She was just an employee who left."
Richard didn't look at her. He kept looking at the ring. His hand was still trembling. The stone caught the light again and I could see a tiny scratch on the band that I had never noticed before.
I felt my throat get tight. Mom wasn't just an employee. Mom used to hum while she folded laundry and she knew how to make toast without burning it and she held my hand in the hospital until her fingers were cold.
"Where have you been staying," Richard said to me. His voice was quiet and rough. "Since your mom... since she passed. Where are you staying now?"
I swallowed. The cloth was still open on my hand, empty now.
"I came on the bus," I said. "Mom saved the money for the ticket. She wrote the address on the cloth package. I've been at the bus station. I waited until tonight because she said the gala was tonight."
I didn't tell him about the bench by the bathrooms where the lights stayed on all night. I didn't tell him about keeping my backpack under my legs so no one would take it.
Richard closed his fingers around the ring. Not tight. Just holding it. He looked up at me then, and his eyes were red at the edges. He looked like he wanted to say something else but he looked over at Vivian first.
Vivian's hands were still clasped but her knuckles had gone white around her sapphire necklace.
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"An employee," she said again, softer this time, to Richard. "That's all she was. We shouldn't confuse the child."
The room felt very warm. The mirror lights hummed. Richard was still kneeling in front of me holding the ring, and Vivian was still by the door, and I was standing there with the empty cloth in my hands waiting for him to tell the truth Mom said he knew.
