Chapter 5
The door slid shut behind him and the room felt too quiet after.
The man who'd been standing behind the frosted glass wasn't there anymore. I could see the empty hallway through the glass now, just the white tile and the edge of the nurses' station. My arm was still out on the paper sheet. The surgeon had pulled the gauze back down to cover the bruise, not taped, just laid there. He kept one gloved hand lightly on the bed rail near my elbow, not touching the marks.
A nurse leaned in and said something low to him, and he nodded. I heard him say, "Family waiting area, please. Staff will stay with him."
Then the door opened again and a woman came in. She wasn't in scrubs. She had a dark blue cardigan over a gray shirt, and a clipboard with a few papers and a hospital badge that said her name and underneath it, in smaller letters, Social Work. She had brown hair pulled back and she didn't come straight to the bed.
She stopped a few feet away and knelt down. Not crouched, really knelt, so her knees were on the floor and her eyes were level with mine. She smiled, but not big.
"Hey there," she said, quiet. Her voice was lower than the nurse's. "I'm Ms. Alvarez. I work with kids who come through here. Is it okay if I sit with you for a bit?"
I nodded. I didn't know what else to do.
She didn't stand up to get a chair. She stayed kneeling for a second, then shifted to sit on the edge of the small stool by the bed. She set her clipboard on the counter behind her, not on her lap. "I brought a couple things, in case you want them," she said. She reached into a tote bag I hadn't noticed. She pulled out a folded light blue blanket, the warm kind from the blanket warmer, and a little paper cup with a lid and a straw. "Water's cold. Blanket's warm. You don't have to take either. Do you want one?"
My chest still felt tight from before. My hand was back on my t-shirt, clutching it. I looked at the cup.
"Water's okay," I said.
She handed it to me without making me reach too far. Her hands were empty, no gloves. I held the cup with both hands. The water was cold through the paper.
"Do you want the blanket on your legs?" she asked. "Sometimes this room gets cold."
I nodded again and she unfolded it and laid it over my lap. She didn't tuck it around me. She just smoothed it once and left her hands in her lap after.
The surgeon was still by the sink, washing his hands, giving us space but not leaving. Ms. Alvarez glanced at him, then back at me.
"I'm here to make sure you're safe and that you get to say what you want to say, when you're ready," she said. "I'll ask some easy questions to start. You can answer, or you can say you don't want to answer. Okay?"
"Okay," I whispered.
She asked what my name was and how old I was and what grade I was in. I told her. She asked if I knew what day it was and if I'd eaten dinner. Small questions. She didn't write while I talked. She just listened.
Then she looked at my arm, at the edge of the gauze. "I see the doctors are looking at your arm. Can you tell me how your arm's feeling right now?"
It hurt to lift it. I said it was sore.
She nodded. "Thanks for telling me," she said. "Is there anything you want me to know about your arm?"
I stared at the white paper on the bed. I could feel the blanket warm on my knees and the cold cup in my hands. I didn't want to say the wrong thing. I didn't want him to hear me, even though he wasn't at the door anymore.
Ms. Alvarez waited. She didn't push. The fluorescent light hummed overhead.
I took a breath that shook a little. "Do I have to go home tonight?" I asked. My voice was so quiet I wasn't sure she heard me.
She heard me. Her face didn't change fast, but her eyes softened. She leaned forward just an inch.
"That's a really important question," she said. "Thank you for asking it. Here's what I can tell you honestly. The doctors and I have a job to keep kids safe. When we see a hurt like the one on your arm, we have to make a report and check to make sure home is safe before you go back. That means you won't just go home without us making a plan first. I can't promise exactly where you'll stay tonight until we talk more and I talk to my team, but I can promise you won't be sent somewhere unsafe without someone checking. And you won't be alone while we figure it out."
I held the cup tighter. The straw made a little crinkle.
"Are you scared to go home?" she asked. Not telling me what to say. Just asking.
I nodded. I couldn't get the words out bigger. I looked down at the blanket and nodded again.
May you like
"Thank you for telling me that," she said. Her voice stayed steady and low. "That helps me do my job. We're going to stay right here together and keep figuring out the next safe step. I'm not going anywhere for a while."
The surgeon turned off the water and dried his hands. He stayed by the wall, close enough that I could see his blue scrubs in the corner of my eye. Ms. Alvarez pulled her clipboard toward her now, just a little, and clicked her pen, but she didn't start writing yet. She kept looking at me, waiting for whatever I wanted to say next.
