Chapter 3: The Laundry Room Door
I didn't move from my chair even though my legs wanted to. My bunny was still pressed against my chest and my cheeks felt hot and wet. Daddy had his phone in his hand and the little circle on the screen kept spinning.
The dining room was quiet except for the hum of the table lamp. Vanessa was still sitting behind me at the table. I could feel her watching him and not me. Daddy's thumb hovered over the screen and then he tapped again.
The app made a soft chime and the picture jumped.
It was our laundry room. The camera was up in the corner by the ceiling, looking down. You could see the white washer and dryer and the gray floor and the door that led back to the kitchen. In the corner of the video there were white numbers that said 6:42 PM.
At 6:42, the door opened.
I saw myself come in first. I was in my white dress and I was holding my bunny the same way I was holding it now, with both arms. Vanessa's hand was around my upper arm, not my hand. Her fingers were tight around me and she was pulling me forward. I wasn't walking on my own. She guided me past the dryer and stopped by the far wall where the detergent sat on the shelf. Her mouth was moving but the phone speaker was low so I couldn't hear it yet.
Daddy turned the volume up with his other thumb. He didn't say anything. His breathing got louder.
Then on the screen, Vanessa let go of me and stepped back toward the door. I stayed where she put me. I made myself small against the wall and pushed my bunny up under my chin. On the video my shoulders started to shake.
Vanessa said something sharp. The audio was muffled like it was coming through a wall, but I recognized the tone. It was the same way she'd spoken when she said I was being difficult and needed to learn. I was crying on the video even though you couldn't see tears from that far away. You could hear it, a thin, high sound that broke in the middle. I kept saying something but the camera couldn't pick up my words, only hers. She took a step closer and pointed at me, then she turned and pulled the laundry room door closed.
The door clicked shut. The picture was just me alone in that small room. The washer was between me and the door. I slid down until I was sitting on the floor with my back against the dryer, my dress bunched around my knees, my bunny held so tight my knuckles went white even on camera. I cried without stopping. You could hear the dryer humming and my crying over it.
Daddy watched the whole thing without blinking. The numbers in the corner ticked to 6:44 PM. I was still on the floor. Nobody came back for me.
Then he dragged his thumb backward across the bottom of the screen. The white numbers jumped back to 6:42 PM and he played it again.
This time he watched her hand more closely. The way she held my arm. The way she shut the door. His jaw got tight and a muscle moved in his cheek. His stubble caught the warm light from the lamp. He didn't look shocked like before. His eyes got narrower and his mouth pressed into a flat line. He held his breath for a second and then let it out hard through his nose.
Vanessa must have seen his face change because she leaned forward in her chair. Her hands were flat on the woven placemat next to her water goblet.
"That's not — it wasn't like that," she said quickly. Her voice was higher than usual. "I just took her in there to calm down. She was throwing a fit before dinner."
Daddy didn't look at her. He kept his eyes on the phone as the video played a third time, just the part where the door closed and I was left inside. The small sound of my crying came through the phone speaker again, louder now in the quiet dining room.
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He finally looked up at her. His eyes were not confused anymore.
Vanessa stared at the phone screen where I was still sitting on the laundry room floor. She realized the camera had been recording the whole time.
