I Clutched My Teddy Bear In Lincoln Park While He Said I Looked Like Her...

The diner on Highway 31 had a buzzing sign that said EAT and the parking lot was mostly trucks. I held my bear against my chest the whole walk from the bench to the black SUV and then from the SUV to the diner door. Lily held Marcus's hand. I held my bear.

It was cooler outside the park. The deputy followed us in his cruiser and parked beside the SUV. The bodyguard held the glass door open. A bell jingled.

Inside it smelled like coffee and grease. The waitress looked at us, at my dress, at Lily's pink dress, at Marcus's suit, and then she didn't stare anymore. She grabbed two plastic menus.

Marcus didn't ask me where I wanted to sit. He slid into the booth side by the window and lifted Lily in next to him, then looked at me.

"You can sit by me," Lily said, patting the vinyl.

I sat on the other side of Lily so I wasn't next to the window. My bear was on my lap. My legs didn't reach the edge of the booth. The deputy came in and took the booth behind us, turning his hat in his hands. The bodyguard stood by the register where he could see the door and the parking lot.

The waitress came back with crayons she didn't offer to me. She looked at Marcus.

"What can I get for you folks, hon?"

Marcus kept his voice low. "Two grilled cheese, cut in triangles. Two milks. And a coffee, black."

She wrote it down. "You got it."

Lily swung her feet. "I like grilled cheese with extra cheese," she said to me. She whispered it like a secret. "Do you?"

I nodded a little. My throat felt tight. The lights were bright and I kept looking at the deputy's radio.

When the waitress left, Marcus leaned forward. He didn't reach for me.

"We're just going to eat something warm," he said. "Then Deputy Reyes needs to ask you a couple questions for his report. That's all. Okay, Emma?"

I nodded again. My hands were around my bear. The fur was flat where I'd held it all day.

The food came fast. Two white plates, two cartons of milk with straws. The grilled cheese was steaming and the cheese stretched when Lily pulled hers apart. Marcus pushed one plate toward me and opened the milk for me and put the straw in.

"Careful, it's hot," he said.

I picked up half with one hand. My other arm kept the bear against me. I ate slowly. The bread was buttery and the cheese was salty. I hadn't eaten since the crackers Aunt Karen left on the counter that morning. My hands shook a little around the sandwich and I pressed them tighter around the bear to make it stop.

Lily watched me and then ate hers the same way, with one hand, like she was copying me.

Deputy Reyes came over with a small notebook and his phone. He crouched a little beside our booth so he wasn't standing over me. He had kind eyes.

"Emma, I'm going to take a couple quick pictures for my file," he said, soft. "Just so we remember what you were wearing and that you’re okay. Is that alright?"

I looked at Marcus. Marcus gave me a small nod.

"It's just for safety," Marcus said.

Reyes didn't use a flash. He took one of the front of my dress where the hem was torn, one of the side where the dirt was darker, one close but not touching of my cheek where the faint mark was, and one of the bear. I held the bear tighter when he pointed the phone at it. He noticed and said, "I can get him right where he is. You don't have to move him."

He put his phone down and flipped his notebook open.

"Can you tell me your mom's full name?" he asked. He kept his pen ready but not pressuring.

I swallowed. The grilled cheese was still in my other hand. I whispered, "Claire."

"Claire what, honey?" he said.

"Claire Miller," I whispered. My voice was so quiet Lily leaned in. "We lived at Pine Street. Apartment 3B."

Reyes wrote it down carefully. "Pine Street Apartments? Here in town?"

I nodded. I put the sandwich down because my hand was shaking again.

"And Aunt Karen," he said. "Who is she?"

I breathed in. The bear's ear was between my fingers.

"She's my mom's sister," I said. "After Mom died, she said the apartment was hers now. She has the key."

Lily's feet stopped swinging.

Reyes wrote that down and underlined it. He didn't look up right away.

"Did Aunt Karen tell you to wait in Lincoln Park?" he asked.

I nodded. "She said wait by the bench until the sun came up. She said someone would come."

Marcus's hand on the table went still. I saw his silver watch catch the diner light. He didn't say anything, but his jaw moved and his eyes fixed on a spot past the window, like he was seeing something that wasn't in the parking lot.

Lily touched his arm. "Daddy?"

He blinked and looked at me again, softer.

"Claire Miller," he repeated under his breath, not to me, not to the deputy. Just to himself, like the name meant something he hadn't thought about in a long time. His fingers tightened once around his coffee cup and then let go.

Reyes closed his notebook. "Thank you, Emma. That's very helpful. You did good."

The waitress came by with more napkins and didn't say anything about the pictures. I drank my milk through the straw and felt warmer. The cheese in my stomach made me feel sleepy and a little calmer. Marcus slid the second half of his grilled cheese onto my plate without asking.